Perhaps you’re currently pregnant, and you’ve just received the news that your child will likely be born with a disability. Maybe your child is still young, and after worrying about their development for long, you’ve gotten a diagnosis. Yet the relief of finding an answer is combined with emotional turmoil over the fact that your child has a disability. Or maybe your child recently suffered a serious illness or injury. Their doctors do not think they will make a full recovery, and now, you need to figure out how to adapt to their changing needs and support them.

Accepting that your child has a disability can come with heavy grief. It’s not always easy for parents to talk about this form of grief. But you do not have to keep it bottled up inside. Here are a few ways you can cope with your grief around your child’s disability.

Allow Yourself to Fully Grieve

First, it’s important to give yourself permission to truly grieve. Part of you might feel guilty for grieving deeply at this time, especially when your child is struggling, too. People may try to wave away your fears of the future with vague platitudes, which only makes you feel worse.

But as complex and overwhelming as these emotions can be, you cannot afford to shy away from them. Trying to dismiss your authentic feelings can lead to depression, anxiety, and strained familial relationships down the road. You can be strong for your child’s sake while allowing time for yourself to grieve.

Open Up to a Therapist

Maybe you feel like you can’t talk to your friends and family about your feelings. If you have a partner, you might open up to them. Yet you don’t want your partner to have to carry all of your grief on their own. Instead of trying to process these feelings alone, you might benefit from talking to a therapist. In therapy, you can share anything that’s on your mind. You don’t have to worry about judgment from people in your life who don’t really understand the challenges you’re facing.

Your therapist can give you the space you need to express yourself. They can also equip you with healthy coping skills to better regulate your emotions and tend to your child’s needs without neglecting your own.

Connect with People Who Can Relate

You’re not the first parent who has faced this situation. In fact, millions of parents are walking the same path with you. But you may not personally know anyone who is raising a child with a disability. Connecting with a support group online or in-person might be a good choice. You can make new friends and learn from others who have dealt with similar problems.

Find Moments of Contentment

You do not have to force yourself to try to “stay positive” or “keep your chin up.” However, you may be able to find moments of contentment, and even happiness, in each day. It could be something as simple as cuddling with your child, watching them sleep peacefully, or seeing them achieve a small developmental milestone.

Make Space for Things You Love

Right now, it might seem like it’s impossible to focus on yourself. But creating just a little room in your life for the things you love can bring you more joy. Listening to your favorite songs or an audiobook while cleaning, enjoying a tasty dessert, or even appreciating the sunrise can all fit the bill.

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Are you struggling to cope with your grief regarding your child’s disability? Talking to a therapist can serve as a healthy outlet. Contact us to find out more about our women’s or men’s counseling.