Perhaps you’ve always struggled to fit in with others, especially in large groups. You can’t figure out why you sometimes feel so different from your friends. Maybe you need more time to recharge than they do, or you feel like people don’t understand your solitary hobbies. You enjoy spending time on your own, and you’ve always had an empathetic nature — yet when you were young, other people might have shamed you for being sensitive and told you to “toughen up.”
But chances are, there’s nothing wrong with you. In fact, you’re probably a highly sensitive person, often known as an HSP. This isn’t a mental health condition or disorder. It’s simply a collection of traits that encompasses strengths and weaknesses, just like any other personality type. Here are a few common personality traits of HSPs that you might recognize in yourself.
Introversion
While being an HSP and being an introvert are not necessarily the same thing, these traits often go hand in hand. Introverts gain energy from spending time alone. If you’re an HSP, you might feel drained from social interactions, particularly when you’re in a crowd of people who you don’t know.
Even if you’re spending time with friends you’ve known for years, you might need to step away and recharge for a while afterward! If you’re traveling with your loved ones, you might be inclined to book your own hotel room rather than bunking with others. Socializing can feel tiring, and in order to perk up, you’ll likely find yourself craving time alone.
Sensitivity to Overstimulation
This is a core trait that sums up HSPs. Many people handle highly stimulating situations with ease. They might thrive at packed concerts and music festivals, feel at home staying in hostels with strangers, or shine when they’re in front of a crowd. But HSPs can be easily overstimulated.
If you’re in a loud, noisy area with lots of people, the sensations can wear you down. You likely even prefer living in quieter places, and many HSPs like living alone because they have more control over their environments.
Aversion to Conflict
Lots of HSPs will go out of their way to avoid conflict. You might enjoy working from home or being self-employed so that you don’t have to deal with frustrating conflicts in the workplace. But sometimes, it can be hard for you to communicate your boundaries.
Additionally, you may even try to avoid negative news media and fictional content centered around conflicts in movies, books, and music. Exposure to violence can feel overwhelming for HSPs.
Creative Hobbies
As an HSP, you likely have a rich inner life. Even when you’re not saying much out loud, your imagination is running wild. You may have several creative hobbies, like writing, painting, playing an instrument, or dancing. Sometimes, it can feel easier to express yourself through art than in conversations.
Trouble with Change
HSPs often enjoy having predictable routines. If you’re traveling, you like to have a set itinerary that you can follow each day. When you start your workday, you prefer to know exactly what’s on the agenda, and an unexpected meeting can throw you off and make it hard to stay productive.
Going through big life changes like moving can leave you feeling anxious and unsettled. You don’t mind the occasional surprise, but you’re not one to make major decisions spontaneously. You like to think things through and make concrete plans first.
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Do you suspect that you’re a highly sensitive person? Working with a therapist can help you navigate life. Reach out to us to discuss your options for scheduling your first session for either women’s or men’s counseling.