What Causes a Lack of Interest in Sex?

Perhaps you feel like your intimate connection with your partner has been suffering recently. Maybe you haven’t been particularly enthusiastic in the bedroom, or maybe your partner seems completely disinterested in sex. Both of you might be dealing with this lack of interest and worrying about how it could affect the future of your relationship. Or perhaps one of you is still deeply attracted to the other, yet the affection is no longer mutual.

You’re wondering what happened and where things went wrong. In order to find a solution, it’s important to uncover the root of this lack of interest in sex. Here are a few reasons why couples commonly struggle with this issue.

Chronic Stress

Stress can take a toll on one’s libido. When you’re stressed, sex is often the last thing on your mind. You’re too busy juggling other responsibilities to think about intimacy with your partner.

Between work, caring for your family, domestic responsibilities, and the many other pressures and obligations in your life, it’s all too easy to push sex to the back burner. When chronic stress is overtaking your life, it can feel like your libido has somehow disappeared. Even when your partner tries to be romantic, your mind is far from the bedroom.

Lack of Attraction

Sometimes, partners are simply no longer attracted to each other. This does not mean the attraction is gone forever. It’s normal for attraction to ebb and flow throughout the course of a relationship.

However, if one partner finds that they don’t feel any physical attraction to the other anymore, they’ll naturally have less interest in sex. It can also be difficult to have an honest conversation about this problem, so couples might try to dodge this issue out of fear of hurting their partner’s feelings.

couple in bed only feet showing out of blanketPhysical Health Problems

When you’re struggling with your physical health, it’s not surprising that you might lose interest in sex. This can be particularly true for people who have been dealing with medical issues that affect their reproductive system, or who lived with infertility.

If you’ve been in and out of doctor’s offices, or you’ve been taking medications with rough side effects, it’s easy to see why a lack of interest in sex might follow.

Mental Health Struggles

Anxiety, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder, and other mental health troubles can reduce your libido. If you’re depressed, you might lose interest in things you used to love—and this can include intimacy with your partner.

When you’re living with anxiety, you may be so stressed that you simply don’t have any energy for sex. Mental health problems can pose a serious obstacle to enjoying a healthy sex life, and if your partner hasn’t been through the same thing, they might not truly understand how you’re feeling. Without therapy, it can be hard to unpack these problems and revive the spark.

Hormonal Shifts

As we age, we go through many hormonal changes. Women who become pregnant and give birth also experience dramatic hormonal shifts that can significantly affect their libidos. Men also go through hormonal changes as the years go on.

Getting into healthy routines can help in this area. Sometimes, your hormonal health can suffer if you’re not sleeping enough, eating well, or exercising. If you’re concerned about your hormonal health, it’s also a good idea to check in with your doctor, rather than simply trying to deal with the problem on your own.

Are you and your partner struggling with a lack of interest in sex? Talking to a therapist can help you work through it. Reach out to us to discuss your options for scheduling a session for couples therapy.